It's funny how life works out sometimes. After a year of dating I've ended my journey at Bachelor #27, not because we are a couple and I'm done dating. Quite the contrary. He actually dumped me the evening before I'm leaving for a 2 week trip through Spain and I've decided that when I return I am no longer going to try and date.... period. I've gotten rid of every dating site profile/app and I refuse to try anymore. It is a tremendous waste of my time.
I met Bachelor #27 on Match, he emailed me a few days before my account expired. He sent me a funny poem that rhymed and I thought "I bet he sends this poem to every girl" and then I thought "Well at least he was unique." So I gave him my phone number. I then went to Vegas and had an awesome time (and made out with a significantly younger/good looking guy) and then when I came back I called him. We talked for 2 hours on the phone. On our first date he brought me a big beautiful bouquet of flowers. I thought "wow this guy is really nice." We had a great time on our date and talked until the restaurant closed. I could tell he was nervous, but the conversation kept going.
We went out every week (sometimes multiple times a week) and we talked all the time. I seriously thought things were going well. Granted he was boring, went to bed early, got up early (he was a professional golfer), and seemed very introverted and not super exciting or outgoing. I just thought I would give him a decent try because every fun/outgoing guy I date is a total douchebag. Well he ended up being a douchebag also. He kissed me like he would kiss his mother on our 5th date, and our 6th date, and never really made any sort of move. I didn't even hold his hand because I felt like maybe he wasn't into affection. I thought maybe he was just really nervous or shy. But yet I still gave him a chance. Everyone told me "oh he probably likes you so much, that's why he's shy. You should make a move to show him it's ok?" Well we all remember what happened the last time I tried that... refer to Bachelor #8.
On our last date (last Friday) he even offered to drive me to LAX in the morning since I am leaving for Spain (tomorrow). He also said he wanted to see me before I left since I'll be gone for 2 weeks. He said he'd be free Friday (last night). He ended up being held up at work (allegedly) and I said "ok well let me know when you finish work Saturday and I'd like to see you before I go." He said he would be done at 5. So around 5 I texted him and asked how his day was and he said he just left work. Well nearly 2 hours go by and I don't hear from him, and I totally thought we were going to hang out. So I called him and said "hey how's your day how was work" yada yada. What does he say to me? That he thinks we are opposites and he doesn't see it working out long term and have a good trip. Ummm.... WTF? You could have said that at any point this week you piece of shit! Why would you offer to take me to the airport and then a week later decide that it isn't going to work out? I don't deny that we are on the same page and I felt from the start that I was too awesome and fun for him because he is boring, lame, old farty and acts like he's fucking 80 years old. But he really shouldn't have held that in until the night before I leave. So after our brief call I sent him a text saying that was a dick move on his part and he should've said something earlier in the week.
I refuse to let this fucker, or any other fucker that I have dated in the last year, ruin my amazing trip to Spain. I have had this trip planned for a long ass time and I am going to have the best time EVER. So to you Mr. Golfer- you can be boring by yourself while I lay on the sands of Ibiza and drink carafes of red sangria and bask in the warm Spanish sun. And when I return there will be no more dating blog. No more Bachelors, no more dating sites, no more trying. I am drained from a year of nonsense and I have better things to do than waste my time and energy on these losers that walk the streets of Los Angeles.
Fuck dating... The End.
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Saturday, August 17, 2013
Bachelors #25 & 26- Tinder.... A Superficial Hook Up App
Since Match.com wasn't really working out for me I decided to give Tinder a try, after my friend kept suggesting that I download the app. For those of you who don't know, Tinder is an app that pulls in Facebook profiles from a radius around your location and you basically judge guys on their looks since minimal information about them is provided. You swipe left if they are gross/scary, and your swipe right if they are good looking enough to possibly talk to. Tinder then notifies you if you match with a guy you swiped right on. After you're matched you have the opportunity to text within the app. I went out with 2 guys from Tinder, fortunately neither were serial killers.
The first guy lived a few blocks down from me and we had 3 dates until I cut him off. The first 2 dates he seemed nice and relatively normal, meaning no red flags went up. On our 3rd date he said some shit that caught my attention. We were at a local bar watching a soccer match and eating/drinking. We got on the topic of relationships and he mentioned he hadn't had a girlfriend in 3 years by choice. I thought that was odd, then he said that he dated a lot of girls but then would only like "the chase" and got bored after. Oh the dreaded "chase." Apparently all guys like this "chase," and once you show the slightest bit of interest they magically lose interest.
That comment really bothered me because so many guys I've dated in the last year seemed to have the same affliction. They like the chase and then they move on. So I decided I was done with him so I stopped talking to me. A few days later he asked me if there was a deal breaker, so I was honest and said I was looking for a guy who wants something serious and isn't just into the thrill of the chase. He tried to say that he was being sarcastic and he was looking for something serious now, but I didn't believe him and that was that.
Bachelor #26 was also from Tinder and I was convinced he was my soul mate because our personalities totally clicked. Our first date was on the 4th of July and we had sushi. He was so sassy and funny and talkative. We really clicked immediately. We hung out all night, watched fireworks from his house, talked all night... it was a perfect evening.
We had one more date after that, which also was great. After that he totally flaked out on me like a dickhead. I was really surprised to be honest, but then again I am very naïve and blind most of the time. He was supposed to come over for dinner one night and they morning of he sent a lame text saying that he had to help his friend out with some "crap" after work. By "crap" he probably meant he had some chick to bang after work. Who knows.
Promptly after that I deleted my Tinder app and vowed never to use it again.
The first guy lived a few blocks down from me and we had 3 dates until I cut him off. The first 2 dates he seemed nice and relatively normal, meaning no red flags went up. On our 3rd date he said some shit that caught my attention. We were at a local bar watching a soccer match and eating/drinking. We got on the topic of relationships and he mentioned he hadn't had a girlfriend in 3 years by choice. I thought that was odd, then he said that he dated a lot of girls but then would only like "the chase" and got bored after. Oh the dreaded "chase." Apparently all guys like this "chase," and once you show the slightest bit of interest they magically lose interest.
That comment really bothered me because so many guys I've dated in the last year seemed to have the same affliction. They like the chase and then they move on. So I decided I was done with him so I stopped talking to me. A few days later he asked me if there was a deal breaker, so I was honest and said I was looking for a guy who wants something serious and isn't just into the thrill of the chase. He tried to say that he was being sarcastic and he was looking for something serious now, but I didn't believe him and that was that.
Bachelor #26 was also from Tinder and I was convinced he was my soul mate because our personalities totally clicked. Our first date was on the 4th of July and we had sushi. He was so sassy and funny and talkative. We really clicked immediately. We hung out all night, watched fireworks from his house, talked all night... it was a perfect evening.
We had one more date after that, which also was great. After that he totally flaked out on me like a dickhead. I was really surprised to be honest, but then again I am very naïve and blind most of the time. He was supposed to come over for dinner one night and they morning of he sent a lame text saying that he had to help his friend out with some "crap" after work. By "crap" he probably meant he had some chick to bang after work. Who knows.
Promptly after that I deleted my Tinder app and vowed never to use it again.
Bachelor #24- Just Another Prick
Hey everyone, it's been forever since I've written so I have some catching up to do. Bachelor #24 was a guy I went out with in June, post my 31st birthday. We met on match (he reached out to me) and was immediately smitten with me... or so it seemed. We emailed back and forth a few times, he was very forward and kept saying he could tell I was the kind of girl he would bring home to meet his family. I guess a red flag was that he was still LIVING with his family (yes he was in his 30s), but I was trying to not judge him for that.
When we started talking on the phone he had just left for a week to go to AZ for work training, but he called me every single night and we FaceTimed every night while he was away. He was really nice to talk to, very friendly, seemed close to his family (obviously because he lived with them), had a decent job, and it was nice to be able to see who I was talking to. We seemed to click right away, but every time he said to me that he felt that we were a good match and he "had a good feeling about us," I would say "slow down yo, we haven't even met yet."
Well we had 1 date and I thought it was great. We went to this great little Cuban place and had a great dinner and great conversation. Come to find out he was friends with a friend of mine, which gave me hope that he wasn't a dickhead. After dinner we went to a bar and a country band was playing. So we stayed, drank and listened to the music and had a great time. He loved country music as much as I do, which was great because I've never dated a guy who likes country as much as I do.
After the bar we went back to my place and watched a movie. I should've known it wasn't going to work when it was late and his mother was calling him, asking when he was going to be home... #Lame.
After our date we continued to talk, but he never asked me out again. I even asked our mutual friend about him and she said he was a super nice guy. Obviously not. He is just another Mr. Hit It and Quit It. Shortly after our date a friend of mine passed away, and he was aware of this, and he didn't even check to see how I was after the funeral. That was another red flag that he was a piece of shit.
The lesson I learned from this experience is that any guy who claims that you're the kind of girl he would bring home to meet his mother and then sleeps with you and peaces out immediately is a shit face and it's better to learn that right from the start. Fuck him!
When we started talking on the phone he had just left for a week to go to AZ for work training, but he called me every single night and we FaceTimed every night while he was away. He was really nice to talk to, very friendly, seemed close to his family (obviously because he lived with them), had a decent job, and it was nice to be able to see who I was talking to. We seemed to click right away, but every time he said to me that he felt that we were a good match and he "had a good feeling about us," I would say "slow down yo, we haven't even met yet."
Well we had 1 date and I thought it was great. We went to this great little Cuban place and had a great dinner and great conversation. Come to find out he was friends with a friend of mine, which gave me hope that he wasn't a dickhead. After dinner we went to a bar and a country band was playing. So we stayed, drank and listened to the music and had a great time. He loved country music as much as I do, which was great because I've never dated a guy who likes country as much as I do.
After the bar we went back to my place and watched a movie. I should've known it wasn't going to work when it was late and his mother was calling him, asking when he was going to be home... #Lame.
After our date we continued to talk, but he never asked me out again. I even asked our mutual friend about him and she said he was a super nice guy. Obviously not. He is just another Mr. Hit It and Quit It. Shortly after our date a friend of mine passed away, and he was aware of this, and he didn't even check to see how I was after the funeral. That was another red flag that he was a piece of shit.
The lesson I learned from this experience is that any guy who claims that you're the kind of girl he would bring home to meet his mother and then sleeps with you and peaces out immediately is a shit face and it's better to learn that right from the start. Fuck him!
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