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I decided to venture into the world of Bumble once again, despite my recent catfish experience and despite the fact that I had just dumped a schmuck that I had met on there just a few month prior. I always go back with the attitude of "it will be different this time," although time after time it never is. I suppose that is the definition of insanity, doing the same thing over and over expecting a different result. I must be insane- but I like to think of myself as hopelessly optimistic.
I met a Bachelor who will be referred to as the Man-Child. Another suitable name would be Faucet because his nose dripped like one. He was 37 years old, worked in the Army Reserves, but also worked for a random social sports company- for which he ran a kickball league. His favorite past time included wearing an animal onesie and going to Carney's with his friends. I can't make this shit up. This grown ass man, who was in the Army, liked to run around in an animal onesie. Aside from that, I could tell he was a man-child because he lived with 2 other grown men in what looked like a disgusting, unkempt, college frat house- where beer pong and other drinking games must have been played night after night. You can tell a lot about a person based on their living conditions.
Man-Child and I went on a few dates for a solid month. We talked about serious topics, including our desire to have families one day and pursue serious relationships. This is what always lures me in- the prospect of meeting someone like myself who shares the same desire of sharing their life with someone. I suppose I should know by this point that this is a trap- yet I fall for it every time.
One weekend the Man-Child had to leave for his Army weekend, and right after he returned the process of ghosting began. He stopped texting, he became flaky, cancelled plans due to alleged illnesses; however, he would reschedule only to cancel again. I was all too familiar with this game, so I called him out on it one day after I had made up my mind that he was garbage. I said that if he didn't want to date then he could've been man enough to say so, that grown men don't ghost women, and that he was in fact a Man-Child. You would think that a man who is near 40 would stop with the bullshit, but I guess that is too much to hope for.
